A little bit like Lot’s Wife

So last night I actually got in bed before Dave, a first in…. who knows how long.  I wasn’t feeling too great and the girls were finally asleep.  I took a bath, gave myself an overdue pedicure and went to bed.  Well tried.  I laid there thinking, as most women out there probably do and couldn’t sleep.  In the end I think Dave, once he came to bed, actually fell asleep before I did.

I thought about what a whirlwind these last two months have been.  I am very happy to be here in Utah and have enjoyed all the get togethers, taking swim lessons with good friends, living at my parents house and watching the cousins play all day and almost all night long.  Now things are winding down a bit and I am getting settled in my new home and new city.  I love the space of our new home and many other good qualities it has, I am getting more comfortable.  However, even though we are “close” to family and friends last night I was thinking back to Modesto and all that I loved there.  I was missing a bunch of things. I made lists in my mind of what I would blog about and all the things I miss. Who would have thought that this “little” city would bring so much joy to me?  Not that I am not happy here in Layton, because I am, but I think everywhere you go in life whether it is on a vacation, to a get together with friends, college or moving out of state there is a piece of you that misses those moments.   I would never go back to high school, that time has come and gone, thank goodness, but I don’t feel that way about Ann Arbor or Modesto.  I would go back.  At least when I am up here in Layton, not in close proximity to those I know and love, then I would go back to having friends 5 minutes or less away.  I just keep hoping that our new neighborhood and ward will prove to be as much fun and inviting as my past 2 wards were.

I went to church and they talked about Lot’s wife and how she kept looking back, not just looking, but yearning to be back in the city.  She didn’t have faith for the future.  A grandmother spoke up about how she always says she wishes her kids were still playing in the backyard and would love to go back to that time.  She quoted Elder Holland, “ The past is to be learned from but not lived in. We look back to claim the embers from glowing experiences but not the ashes. And when we have learned what we need to learn and have brought with us the best that we have experienced, then we look ahead, we remember that faith is always pointed toward the future. Faith always has to do with blessings and truths and events that will yet be efficacious in our lives.”

I really stopped to think. I have been blessed with wonderful experiences and memories, but they are just that.  Memories. In the past.  I need to be better at looking forward to the future and having faith.  I have learned so much from moving around the country and I know bringing those experiences with me will help me with this next step.  So right now it is having faith that I will make new friends and be comfortable here, especially in my new ward.

So in efforts to remember Modesto, but not “yearn” for it I write my list of things that I loved about Modesto and will remember with fondness (yes cheesy, but fitting).

Thank you Modesto for making us happy last year with…

Maddie Jane’s arrival. Park Days. Chatting with girl friends. Library story time. Farmers market.  GNO’s. Scrapbooking/book club nights. Birthday lunches. Play dates.  Music Makers. Taste testing Ashleigh’s yummy treats. Dinners with friends - out and in. Utah Utes parties. Tahoe Joes. Mr. Pickles- no, not pickles, but the turkey sandwiches and Sourdough bread. The Fruit Barn smoothies.Walks to the parks and around the neighborhood. Sister Missionaries. Awesome shower parties. SYTYCD nights. The palm trees next door. Seeing Random uses for garages, instead of parking cars.   Do I dare mention puppies on this list? Lunches with Daddy. A&W. Almonds. Tomatoes. Swing set in the backyard.  Chalk art. Beautiful blossoms in the spring.  Anna’s Nursery leaders.  Primary kids and being 2nd counselor.  Trips to everywhere around us. Mia and Winston playing.  Taking it easy at Kristy’s pool. Picnics. Date nights to Dave’s work events. Dinner at Galettos and Dews. Visitors from Utah.

So many great memories… to many to list them all.